This page will contain images about the onion, as they become available.The OnionThe Onion is a parody newspaper published weekly in print and on the Internet. It contains satirical articles as well as a general entertainment section. As of May 2005 its print editions are distributed in Madison, Milwaukee, New York City, Chicago, Minneapolis-St. Paul, Denver/Boulder, and San Francisco. The Onion's articles comment on current events, both real and imagined (an example of the latter: "All Americans Issued Life Jackets for Some Reason"). It parodies traditional newspaper features and styles. The paper often reports on everyday events in a sensationalistic manner ("Area Man Confounded by Buffet Procedure"). Obsession with fame and celebrity are frequently satirized, as well as the general credulousness of the public. The second half of the newspaper is a non-satirical — but still often humorous — entertainment section called The A.V. Club that features interviews, reviews of various newly-released media, and other weekly features. The print edition also contains previews of upcoming live entertainment specific to cities where a print edition is published. The online incarnation of The A.V. Club has its own domain, includes its own regular features (including weekly sex advice column Savage Love), A.V. Club blogs and reader forums, and presents itself as an almost-separate entity from The Onion itself. Regular features of The Onion include:
The newspaper was revamped on August 31, 2005, which changed the layout of the website homepage. As well:
The staff of the Onion have also produced numerous books, including Our Dumb Century, Finest News Reporting, and Dispatches from the Tenth Circle. Both print and online editions of The Onion are published on Wednesdays. Reporters and editorsThe Onion's fictional editor is T. Herman Zweibel (Zwiebel is German for onion), who has "held the position since 1901" and is rather insane; the real editor is currently Scott Dikkers, the managing editor is Peter Koechley, and the current writing staff comprises Todd Hanson, Maria Schneider, John Krewson, Joe Garden, and Chris Karwowski, as well as the graphics work of Mike Loew and Chad Nackers. Past writers have included Max Cannon, Rich Dahm, Tim Harrod, David Javerbaum, Ben Karlin, Carol Kolb, Robert Siegel, and Jack Szwergold. Each issue features columns by (fictional) regular and guest writers. The regular contributors include:
HistoryThe Onion was founded in 1988 and originally published in Madison, Wisconsin by two juniors at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, Tim Keck and Christopher Johnson; they sold it to colleagues the following year. The Onion remained a regional success until it began its website in 1996. A possible origin for its name is a mispronunciation of "The Union", which is a fairly common name for a legitimate paper. In early 2001, the company relocated its offices to New York City. As of 2004 the paper's founders are publishers of other weeklies: Keck of the Seattle weekly The Stranger and Johnson of Albuquerque's Weekly Alibi. In late August 2005, The Onion's companion website The Onion A.V. Club relaunched in a new design which presents the content as almost entirely discrete from The Onion itself. Simultaneously The Onion discontinued their Premium Service which charged readers a substantial fee for additional content and vintage archives. This brings The Onion back to the open state it was in prior to April 2004 when the restrictive move towards a Premium Service was first initiated. Awards and nominationsThe Onion's graphic for its coverage of the 9/11 terrorist attacks.The Onion's coverage of the September 11, 2001 attacks less than two weeks following the attacks was one of the earliest satirical reactions to those attacks, and was considered for a Pulitzer Prize. The Onion taken too seriouslyUpon occasion the straight-faced manner in which the Onion reports non-existent happenings has resulted in outside parties mistakenly citing Onion stories as real news. In 1998, controversial minister Fred Phelps posted the Onion article '98 Homosexual-recruitment drive nearing goal on his God Hates Fags website as proof that homosexuals were indeed actively trying to get straight people to join their ranks. Just after the 2000 U.S. Presidential election, when the future President remained undetermined, the Onion published a story titled Bush or Gore: "A New Era Dawns" which parodied the similarities between the two politicians. The noteworthiness of this story was largely a matter of luck: the paper went to press election night, before the contested election results which led to Bush v. Gore. As the recount process unfolded, the Onion published a satirical issue reporting chaos in America, in which Serbia sent peacekeepers to the U.S. to introduce democracy and protect their interests in the region, Bill Clinton declared himself "President for life.", Bob Dole was shot, and Tipper Gore was being held hostage. On June 7, 2002, Reuters reported that the Beijing Evening News republished, in the international news page of its June 3 edition, translated portions of Congress Threatens To Leave D.C. Unless New Capitol Is Built (they were apparently unaware of The Onion's satirical nature). The story discusses the U.S. Congress's threats to leave Washington for Memphis, Tennessee or Charlotte, North Carolina unless Washington, DC built them a new Capitol building with a retractable dome. The article is a parody of U.S. sports franchises' threats to leave their home city unless new stadiums are built for them. The Evening News is Beijing's most popular newspaper, claiming a circulation of 1.25 million. In late March 2004, Deborah Norville of MSNBC presented as genuine an article entitled Study: 58 Percent Of U.S. Exercise Televised. [1] Columnist Ellen Makkai and others who believe the Harry Potter books recruit children to Satanism have also been taken in by The Onion's satire, using quotes from an Onion article as evidence for their claims. [2] [3] Recently, an article from The Onion appeared on the 2005 Advanced Placement English Language and Composition test, in which students were asked to write an essay analyzing its use of satire.[4] Presidential Seal ControversyIn September 2005, the assistant counsel to President George W. Bush, Grant M. Dixton, wrote a cease and desist letter to The Onion, asking the paper to stop using the presidential seal, which is used in an online segment poking fun at the President through parodies of his weekly radio address. The law governing the Presidential Seal is contained in TITLE 18, 713 and contains the section:
This section would seem to allow the use of the presidential seal by The Onion. However, by Executive Order President Richard Nixon specifically enumerated the allowed uses of the Presidential Seal which is more restictive than the above title (Ex. Ord. No. 11649), but which allows for exceptions to be granted upon formal request. The Onion has responded with a letter asking for formal use of the Seal in accordance with the Executive Order, while still declaring that the use is legitimate under Title 18, 713. The letter written by Rochelle H. Klaskin, the Onion's lawyer, is quoted in the New York Times as saying "It is inconceivable that anyone would think that, by using the seal, The Onion intends to 'convey... sponsorship or approval' by the president," referring to Title 18, 713, but then went on to ask that the letter be considered a formal application asking for permission to use the seal. InfluencesIn 1978 National Lampoon released the book "National Lampoon's Sunday Newspaper Parody" which was edited by P.J. O'Rourke and John Hughes. The book was an issue of the fictional "Ohio Republican-Democrat," a tabloid style newspaper. The paper contained all the usual sections found in most major newspapers (classified ads, Sunday magazines, sports, local news, comics) satirized with the anarchistic Lampoon sense of humor. While it is unknown if this book directly inspired/influenced The Onion's founders, it certainly shares similarities. Also, the National Lampoon crew has had a lasting influence on most American humorists, so it is not unlikely that The Onion's founders and staff had been influenced by them (considering that National Lampoon grew out of the college humor publication Harvard Lampoon and that The Onion also began as a college humor magazine.) Another popular send-up of the news that pre-dates The Onion is the Weekend Update segment on Saturday Night Live. References to The Onion in popular cultureMAD Magazine ran a parody of The Onion called "The Bunion" in one issue. Books
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MAD Magazine ran a parody of The Onion called "The Bunion" in one issue. The best wrist protection is soft enough to allow normal wrist motion, but is able to absorb loads for hyper extension of the wrist. Another popular send-up of the news that pre-dates The Onion is the Weekend Update segment on Saturday Night Live. Shorts and rigid splints could cause severe forearm fractures. Also, the National Lampoon crew has had a lasting influence on most American humorists, so it is not unlikely that The Onion's founders and staff had been influenced by them (considering that National Lampoon grew out of the college humor publication Harvard Lampoon and that The Onion also began as a college humor magazine.). Be aware that wrist guards made for in-line are dangerous and not recomended. While it is unknown if this book directly inspired/influenced The Onion's founders, it certainly shares similarities. Snowboard-related injury accounts for 100,000 of the wrist fractures in the world each season. The paper contained all the usual sections found in most major newspapers (classified ads, Sunday magazines, sports, local news, comics) satirized with the anarchistic Lampoon sense of humor. Time not money will make a skilled, safe snowboarder. The book was an issue of the fictional "Ohio Republican-Democrat," a tabloid style newspaper. It is worthy of note that many of the worlds pros began on old equipment, riding on very small hills. O'Rourke and John Hughes. A professional lesson, or a day spent with a skilled friend is highly recomended. In 1978 National Lampoon released the book "National Lampoon's Sunday Newspaper Parody" which was edited by P.J. Beginners should start on very gentle slopes with soft snow conditions, even if they're a good alpine skier. sponsorship or approval' by the president," referring to Title 18, 713, but then went on to ask that the letter be considered a formal application asking for permission to use the seal. It is highly recomended that all riders wear a helmet. Klaskin, the Onion's lawyer, is quoted in the New York Times as saying "It is inconceivable that anyone would think that, by using the seal, The Onion intends to 'convey.. Necessary safety measures must be taken. The letter written by Rochelle H. Beginners are in great danger during first hours of practice. The Onion has responded with a letter asking for formal use of the Seal in accordance with the Executive Order, while still declaring that the use is legitimate under Title 18, 713. Injuries for snowboarders are very common, especially for upperlimb: wrist, elbows and shoulders. 11649), but which allows for exceptions to be granted upon formal request. This is obviously easier with a less biased stance, such as the "duck" stance. No. When a rider changes direction mid-run (for example a "regular" rider leads with their left foot), they are said to be riding "switch". Ord. The question of how much the bindings are angled depends on the rider's purpose and preference. However, by Executive Order President Richard Nixon specifically enumerated the allowed uses of the Presidential Seal which is more restictive than the above title (Ex. However, personal preference and comfort are important with regard to this setting, so experimentation is recommended. This section would seem to allow the use of the presidential seal by The Onion. The usual measurement is to position the bindings so that the feet are placed just wider than shoulder width apart. Whoever knowingly displays any printed or other likeness of the great seal of the United States, or of the seals of the President or the Vice President of the United States, or the seal of the United States Senate, or the seal of the United States House of Representatives, or the seal of the United States Congress, or any facsimile thereof, in, or in connection with, any advertisement, poster, circular, book, pamphlet, or other publication, public meeting, play, motion picture, telecast, or other production, or on any building, monument, or stationery, for the purpose of conveying, or in a manner reasonably calculated to convey, a false impression of sponsorship or approval by the Government of the United States or by any department, agency, or instrumentality thereof, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than six months, or both. (emphasis added). Obviously, the size of the rider has much to do with proper stance width. The law governing the Presidential Seal is contained in TITLE 18, 713 and contains the section:. Stance width is important because it determines how the rider is balanced on the board. Dixton, wrote a cease and desist letter to The Onion, asking the paper to stop using the presidential seal, which is used in an online segment poking fun at the President through parodies of his weekly radio address. A good snowboarder should be equally skilled in riding both ways, even if they have a particular preference. Bush, Grant M. Most people have a natural stance determined by experimentation, and the two stances are roughly equally common. In September 2005, the assistant counsel to President George W. "Goofy" is just the opposite - the right foot leads and the left foot is at the back. Recently, an article from The Onion appeared on the 2005 Advanced Placement English Language and Composition test, in which students were asked to write an essay analyzing its use of satire.[4]. A "regular" stance is one in which the rider's left foot is the front foot, while the right foot is the back foot. [2] [3]. There are two "stances" used by snowboarders. Columnist Ellen Makkai and others who believe the Harry Potter books recruit children to Satanism have also been taken in by The Onion's satire, using quotes from an Onion article as evidence for their claims. This is most likely to happen when the rider removes the board at the top or the bottom of a run (or while on a chairlift, which could be dangerous). [1]. Nevertheless, most ski areas require the use of a "leash" that connects the snowboard to the rider's leg or boot, in case the snowboard manages to get away from its rider. Exercise Televised. Furthermore it reduces the dangerous prospect of a board hurtling downhill riderless, and the rider slipping downhill on his back with no means to maintain grip on a steep slope. In late March 2004, Deborah Norville of MSNBC presented as genuine an article entitled Study: 58 Percent Of U.S. Automatic release is not required in snowboarding, as the rider's legs are fixed in a static position and twisting of the knee joint cannot occur to the same extent. The Evening News is Beijing's most popular newspaper, claiming a circulation of 1.25 million. With skis, this mechanism is designed to protect from injuries (particularly to the knee) caused by skis torn in different directions. sports franchises' threats to leave their home city unless new stadiums are built for them. Snowboard bindings, unlike ski bindings, do not automatically release upon impact or after falling over. The article is a parody of U.S. Strap-in, step-in, and hybrid bindings are used by most recreational riders and all freestyle riders. Congress's threats to leave Washington for Memphis, Tennessee or Charlotte, North Carolina unless Washington, DC built them a new Capitol building with a retractable dome. There are several types of bindings. The story discusses the U.S. The bindings are fixed to the board, and hold the booted feet in place using a variety of systems. Unless New Capitol Is Built (they were apparently unaware of The Onion's satirical nature). Though bindings are not strictly part of the snowboard, they are necessary for its use. On June 7, 2002, Reuters reported that the Beijing Evening News republished, in the international news page of its June 3 edition, translated portions of Congress Threatens To Leave D.C. Other boots, such as Sorel-style boots, may look like they would work with a snowboard, but are unsuitable for snowboarding. to introduce democracy and protect their interests in the region, Bill Clinton declared himself "President for life.", Bob Dole was shot, and Tipper Gore was being held hostage. Snowboard boots differ from other types of boots in that they provide internal support to transfer the rider's movements to the board. As the recount process unfolded, the Onion published a satirical issue reporting chaos in America, in which Serbia sent peacekeepers to the U.S. Hard boots have become less common and are generally only found in more specialist stores. Gore. Hard boots are very similar to ski boots and provide greater stability, increased control and quicker responsiveness on the snowboard. The noteworthiness of this story was largely a matter of luck: the paper went to press election night, before the contested election results which led to Bush v. Generally, hard boots are used for alpine carving and racing, whereas soft boots are used in freestyle and freeride. Presidential election, when the future President remained undetermined, the Onion published a story titled Bush or Gore: "A New Era Dawns" which parodied the similarities between the two politicians. Soft boots look similar to winter boots and have a relatively comfortable, flexible feel that provides the forgiveness necessary for landing jumps and balancing on rails. Just after the 2000 U.S. Snowboard boots come in two main types, soft boots and hard boots. In 1998, controversial minister Fred Phelps posted the Onion article '98 Homosexual-recruitment drive nearing goal on his God Hates Fags website as proof that homosexuals were indeed actively trying to get straight people to join their ranks. Snowboard designs differ primarily in:. Upon occasion the straight-faced manner in which the Onion reports non-existent happenings has resulted in outside parties mistakenly citing Onion stories as real news. The base of the board may also feature graphics, often designed to make the manufacturer recognisable in photos. The Onion's coverage of the September 11, 2001 attacks less than two weeks following the attacks was one of the earliest satirical reactions to those attacks, and was considered for a Pulitzer Prize. Snowboard topsheet graphics can be a highly personal statement and many riders spend many hours customizing the look of their boards. This brings The Onion back to the open state it was in prior to April 2004 when the restrictive move towards a Premium Service was first initiated. The top of the board typically sports graphics designed by board makers to attract riders to their boards. Simultaneously The Onion discontinued their Premium Service which charged readers a substantial fee for additional content and vintage archives. The edges of the base are fitted with a steel edge, just a couple millimeters square, which helps the board grab the snow when tipped up on edge. Club relaunched in a new design which presents the content as almost entirely discrete from The Onion itself. The base (the side of the board that touches the snow) is covered with a plastic called p-tex, which is typically sintered to help it absorb wax, which helps it slide faster. In late August 2005, The Onion's companion website The Onion A.V. The front or "nose" of the board is upturned, to help the board glide over uneven snow; the back or "tail" of the board may be more or less upturned to enable backwards (switch or switchstance) riding. As of 2004 the paper's founders are publishers of other weeklies: Keck of the Seattle weekly The Stranger and Johnson of Albuquerque's Weekly Alibi. Most snowboards are constructed of a wood core and laminated with fiberglass. In early 2001, the company relocated its offices to New York City. Snowboards come in several different styles, depending on the type of riding intended:. A possible origin for its name is a mispronunciation of "The Union", which is a fairly common name for a legitimate paper. Many professionals still opt not to involve themselves in the Olympic event, citing dissatisfaction with rules and with the concept of Olympic Snowboarding itself. The Onion remained a regional success until it began its website in 1996. Despite this rivalry, it is their establishment which finally convinces the IOC to declare snowboarding a new Olympic discipline in 1995. The Onion was founded in 1988 and originally published in Madison, Wisconsin by two juniors at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, Tim Keck and Christopher Johnson; they sold it to colleagues the following year. Later, the ISF (International Snowboard Federation) originated primarily due to dissatisfaction with the new ISA rules. The regular contributors include:. Due to the need for universal contest regulations, the ISA (International Snowboard Association) was founded in 1994. Each issue features columns by (fictional) regular and guest writers. The growing popularity of the sport is reflected by the history of snowboarding as an official sport: In 1985 the first World Cup is held in Zürs, Austria. Past writers have included Max Cannon, Rich Dahm, Tim Harrod, David Javerbaum, Ben Karlin, Carol Kolb, Robert Siegel, and Jack Szwergold. This opinion was well expressed in Heckler Magazine's "Declaration of Independents Snowboarding, Skateboarding and Music: An Intersection of Cultures.". Herman Zweibel (Zwiebel is German for onion), who has "held the position since 1901" and is rather insane; the real editor is currently Scott Dikkers, the managing editor is Peter Koechley, and the current writing staff comprises Todd Hanson, Maria Schneider, John Krewson, Joe Garden, and Chris Karwowski, as well as the graphics work of Mike Loew and Chad Nackers. Many snowboarders are disappointed with the over-commercialization and of the sport, having viewed it as a very personal expression of themselves, similar to skateboarding, art and music. The Onion's fictional editor is T. Snowboarding is now coming to terms with its popularity. . Ski companies are now absorbing many snowboard companies, creating their own and, arguably, designing skis which directly borrow technology and design from snowboards (see shaped skis and twin skis). Both print and online editions of The Onion are published on Wednesdays. Many ski companies reacted negatively to snowboarding during the sport's infancy. The staff of the Onion have also produced numerous books, including Our Dumb Century, Finest News Reporting, and Dispatches from the Tenth Circle. In reaction, Transworld Snowboarding created a popular t-shirt called "Answers," which included the answers to many questions posed by skiers, including: "Yes I can stop." Many resorts did not initially allow snowboards and insisted on the use of superfluous leashes and were known to insist that riders prove their ability before being allowed on the hill. As well:. Snowboarding was seen as a fad. The newspaper was revamped on August 31, 2005, which changed the layout of the website homepage. During the early years of the sport, snowboards and snowboarders were not widely respected by the ski industry and culture. Regular features of The Onion include:. Nowadays there are millions of snowboarders around the world and a multi-million dollar industry trying to satisfy their needs. Club blogs and reader forums, and presents itself as an almost-separate entity from The Onion itself. Since its early years, the snowboard has been improved steadily and has taken the world by storm. Club has its own domain, includes its own regular features (including weekly sex advice column Savage Love), A.V. One of the most mentionable however is Bob patent from 1972, which he sold in 1990 to Jake Burton Carpenter, founder and owner of Burton Snowboards, today's largest manufacturer of snowboard-specific products. The online incarnation of The A.V. This process included different stages and individual ideas and resulted in several patents for snowboard-like constructions. The print edition also contains previews of upcoming live entertainment specific to cities where a print edition is published. The history of the snowboard starts in Utah, [1]U.S.A., where pioneers like Sherman Poppen, Dimitrije Milovich, Bob Webber, Jake Burton Carpenter, Tom Sims, Mike Olson, and Chuck Barfoot developed prototypes mainly inspired by surfboards in the 1970s. Club that features interviews, reviews of various newly-released media, and other weekly features. . The second half of the newspaper is a non-satirical — but still often humorous — entertainment section called The A.V. A snowboard is not to be confused with a monoboard. Obsession with fame and celebrity are frequently satirized, as well as the general credulousness of the public. Analogous to a surfboard or skateboard for snow, snowboards are typically about a metre and a half long by about 30 centimetres wide, with metal edges and an upturned lip at each end. The paper often reports on everyday events in a sensationalistic manner ("Area Man Confounded by Buffet Procedure"). Attached to the rider's feet with bindings, it is ridden down snow-covered slopes or dry ski slopes without the use of ski poles. It parodies traditional newspaper features and styles. A snowboard is a board ridden by a rider in the sport of snowboarding. The Onion's articles comment on current events, both real and imagined (an example of the latter: "All Americans Issued Life Jackets for Some Reason"). ISBN 0-393-32692-0 michaelbarnett@iinet.net.au. Paul, Denver/Boulder, and San Francisco. Norton & Company. As of May 2005 its print editions are distributed in Madison, Milwaukee, New York City, Chicago, Minneapolis-St. W.W. It contains satirical articles as well as a general entertainment section. The Snowboard Book: A Guide for All Boarders. The Onion is a parody newspaper published weekly in print and on the Internet. Hart, Lowell (1997). "Embedded in America": The Onion Ad Nauseam Complete News Archives Volume 16 (2005, ISBN 1400054567). Patent 5190311 -- Snowboard binding system. "Fanfare for the Area Man": The Onion Ad Nauseam Complete News Archives Volume 15 (2004, ISBN 1400054559). U.S. and Them": The Onion Ad Nauseam: Complete News Archives Volume 14 (2003, ISBN 140004961X). Patent 3900204 -- Mono-ski. "Relations Break Down Between U.S. U.S. The Onion Ad Nauseam: Complete News Archives Volume 13 (2002, ISBN 1400047242). Patent 3378274 -- Surf-type snow ski. Dispatches from the Tenth Circle: The Best of The Onion (2001, ISBN 0609808346). U.S. The Onion's Finest News Reporting, Volume 1 (2000, ISBN 0609804634). This stance is becoming increasingly popular, and is the most resilient of the three. Our Dumb Century: The Onion Presents 100 Years of Headlines from America's Finest News Source (1999, ISBN 0609804618). Duck stance: Useful for tricks by removing the forward bias altogether, the feet are angled equally outwards such as 15° and -15°. Gorzo the Mighty, the Emperor of the Universe, villain in the style of 1930s science fiction. Alpine stance: Used primarily for racing, the leading foot may be anything up to 70° and the trailing foot generally 5° less. Jackie Harvey, a ridiculously uninformed media critic who writes the column The Outside Scoop. Forward stance: Suitable for most purposes, the leading foot is angled roughly 21° and the trailing foot at 6°. Jean Teasdale, an overweight nerdish woman with kitsch tastes, whose constantly upbeat attitude always finds the bright side of her otherwise depressing white trash life. Alpine snowboards tend to be longer and thinner with a much stiffer flex for greater edge hold and better carving performance. Smoove B, a smooth talking ladies' man who insists on the best of everything for his dates. The stiff bindings and boots give much more control over the board and allow the board to be carved much more easily than with softer bindings. Herbert Kornfeld, Accounts Receivable Supervisor, a white man with a boring desk job who speaks in gangsta rap-isms and ebonics. Extreme carvers and some Boarder Cross racers also use plate bindings. He is similar to the Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons. Plate - Plate bindings are used with hardboots on Alpine or racing snowboards. Larry Groznic, an overweight geek with an obsession for subcultural fandoms. This allows the rider to apply pressure and effect a "heelside" turn. Jim Anchower, a slacker and stoner with a different job every few weeks, whose musical tastes are stuck in 1970s rock and roll. The HyBak was originally designed by inventer Jeff Grell and built by Flite Snowboards. Jackie Harvey was given his own blog. Highback - A stiff moulded support behind the heel and up the calf area. A daily fictional stock market analysis titled "Stock Watch", a web opinion poll titled "QuickPoll", and "National News Highlights" of three regional stories, were added. In 2004, K2 released the Cinch series, a similar hybrid binding; riders slip their foot in as they would a Flow binding, however rather than webbing, the foot is held down by straps which can then be micro-adjusted for superior fit and performance. "In the News" was retitled "From the Print Edition". The rider's boot is held down by a webbing that covers most of the foot. "What Do You Think?" became "American Voices," with the question updated daily, and only three responders each day. An example is the Flow binding system which is similar to a strap-in binding, except that the foot enters the binding through the back (which then clips into place) rather than the top. Up until August 31, 2005, one of them was almost always a "systems analyst.". Hybrid - There are also proprietary binding systems that seek to combine the convenience of step-in systems with the control levels attainable with strap-ins. "What Do You Think?", a survey showing photos of the same six people, although their names and professions change every week. Another problem is the formation of ice in the step-in mechanism, which may make it difficult to get in and out of the bindings. "In the News" photograph and caption with no accompanying story (such as "Frederick's of Anchorage Debuts Crotchless Long Underwear", "National Association Advances Colored Person"). While much more convenient than strap-ins, they are widely considered to be inferior because they do not provide as much of an immediate response from the rider's legs to the board. "The ONION in History": a front page produced in the look of newspapers of an earlier era, satirizing that earlier style and content (these are all taken from the book "Our Dumb Century"). Popular (and incompatible) step-in systems include Burton, K2 Clicker, Rossignol and Switch. Cynical horoscopes. Step-ins use a technology similar to the clipless pedals in cycling, by allowing the binding to snap and engage stiff hardware on the rider's boots. Random and bizarre editorials. Relative to strap-in bindings, step-in bindings use a stiffer shoe sole and boot to maintain responsiveness in compensation for the lack of over the foot restraining straps and (sometimes) lack of binding highback. Point-Counterpoint. Step-in - In response to the inconvenience of strap-in bindings, step-ins were created to make entry easier for beginners, allow for fast ski-lift to slope transition, and appeal to the rental market. "Infographic"), with a bulleted list of items on a theme. Such companies as Salomon, Rossignol, Bakoda, Tech Nine, Ride, Flux and Burton have created different models of cap straps. The "Infograph" (a.k.a. Cap Strap bindings are a recent modification that provide a very tight fit to the heel cup which makes excellent edge control. "STATshot", an illustrated statistical snapshot which parodies "USA Today Snapshots". Also, because there are two points of pressure, the strap locations must be adjusted for each individual rider, making it more cumbersome for rental operations. The downside for this is they take longer to put on, usually requiring the rider to sit in the snow and bend over to adjust the straps. They can be tightly ratcheted closed for a tight fit and good rider control of the board. The foot is held onto the board with two buckle straps - one strapped across the top of the toe area, and one across the ankle area. Strap-in - These are the earliest types of bindings, but perhaps still the most popular and technical. The rider wears a boot which has a thick but flexible sole, and padded uppers. Boards designed for powder conditions exaggerate the differences even more for more floatation on the powder. Freeride and alpine boards, however, have a directional shape with a wider and longer nose. Tail/nose width - Many freestyle boards have equal nose/tail specs for equal performance either direction. There is no standard way to quantify snowboard stiffness, but novices tend to prefer softer flex, racers stiffer flex, and everyone else something in between. Usually a softer flex makes turning easier while a harder flex makes the board more stable at high speed. Flex - The flexibility of a snowboard affects its handling and typically varies with the rider's weight. Shorter sidecut radii (tighter turns) are generally used for halfpipe riding while longer sidecut radii (wider turns) are used for freeride/alpine/racing riding. Most boards use a sidecut radius between 8-9 meters. The curve has a radius that might be a short as 5 meters on a child's board or as large as 17 meters on a racer's board. This curve aids turning and affects the board's handling. Sidecut - The edges of the board are symmetrically curved concavely, so that the width at the tip and tail is greater than the center. This is termed "toe/heel-drag" and can be cured by choosing a wider board or by adjusting the stance angle. Riders with larger feet may have problems with the toes or heels overhanging the side of the board. Most folks ride boards in the 24-25 cm range. Alpine boards are typically 18-21 cm wide, although they can be as narrow as 15 cm. Freestyle boards are up to 28 cm wide, to assist with balance. Width - The width is typically measured at the waist of the board, since the nose and tail width varies with the sidecut and taper. Another factor riders consider when selecting a snowboard is the type of riding it will be used for, freestyle boards being shorter than all-mountain boards. The longer the board, the more stable it is at high speed, but also a bit tougher to control. Rather, snowboards correspond to the weight of the rider, and a board length should be selected so the rider falls in the middle of the manufacturer's weight range for that model and size. It is a myth that the height of the rider dictates the length of the snowboard. Most people ride boards in the 140-165 cm range. Length - Boards for children are as short as 90 centimeters; boards for racers, or "alpine" riders, are as long as 215 cm. Freestyle (pipe): waisted, semi-stiff, medium length, soft boots, either twin-directional or directional, light, deep sidecuts. Freestyle (rails): waisted, flexible, short, soft boots, twin-directional, light. These boards are made specifically for use in powder. Swallow-Tail: Generally a wider board that as a split running down it's tail, which gives it the general look of a swallow's tail. All-Mountain: waisted, varying flexes and lengths, soft boots, sometimes slightly directional, meant to perform well as a Freeride and Freestyle board. Freeride: waisted, sometimes flexible, medium to long length, soft boots, directional. Racing/Alpine: long, stiff to very stiff, hard boots, slightly waisted, directional. |